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Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  youngjusticeforever on Sat Jan 21, 2017 5:57 pm

He was in the upper world. Let me fix it.
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  youngjusticeforever on Sat Jan 21, 2017 5:59 pm

Fixed it.
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  youngjusticeforever on Thu Jan 26, 2017 10:31 pm

Bumping this up Smile
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  youngjusticeforever on Wed Feb 01, 2017 10:36 pm

Neutral

Anybody heeere??

*tumbleweed passes by, dust bunnys hop by*
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  zerowing21 on Fri Mar 03, 2017 8:23 pm

his mentality shouldn't be fluctuating so much. It should be more rock solid.
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  youngjusticeforever on Sat Mar 04, 2017 2:40 am

zerowing21 wrote:his mentality shouldn't be fluctuating so much. It should be more rock solid.

I'm not sure I understand what you mean..?
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  zerowing21 on Sat Mar 04, 2017 3:04 pm

You have his mentality in the age as acting from a child to an adult. That's a no go. keep it more solid.
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  youngjusticeforever on Sat Mar 04, 2017 3:20 pm

zerowing21 wrote:You have his mentality in the age as acting from a child to an adult. That's a no go. keep it more solid.

I feel like it's a more of an immature adult/devious child..Could you give me an idea on what to revise?
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  zerowing21 on Sat Mar 04, 2017 3:54 pm

If he goes between immature teen to mature adult that would be a bit more believable to me.
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  youngjusticeforever on Sat Mar 04, 2017 3:56 pm

zerowing21 wrote:If he goes between immature teen to mature adult that would be a bit more believable to me.

So change the mentality from teen to adult?
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  zerowing21 on Sat Mar 04, 2017 7:30 pm

Yar.
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  youngjusticeforever on Sat Mar 04, 2017 8:40 pm

Done
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  Kyra_Xyrespace on Sun Mar 05, 2017 12:49 pm

youngjusticeforever wrote:Ethnicity: None

Race (If your OC is an alien): Demon, Vampire

Origins: Demon, Vampire

*Ethnicity: Vampire

*Race: Vampire

*Origins: Demon

_________________

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http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1062727/AnimeGirl-144

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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  youngjusticeforever on Sun Mar 05, 2017 2:57 pm

Kyra_Xyrespace wrote:
youngjusticeforever wrote:Ethnicity: None

Race (If your OC is an alien): Demon, Vampire

Origins: Demon, Vampire

*Ethnicity: Vampire

*Race: Vampire

*Origins: Demon

Done
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  youngjusticeforever on Sun Apr 16, 2017 5:00 am

Yo?
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  youngjusticeforever on Fri Jun 30, 2017 1:22 pm

So dis good, mon?
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  zerowing21 on Fri Jun 30, 2017 3:35 pm

You do have my approve, but you need one more.
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  Mr.Didathing on Fri Jun 30, 2017 4:12 pm

Got mine. Honestly it's kinda fascinating how long this one has been in limbo.
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

Post  youngjusticeforever on Fri Jun 30, 2017 4:39 pm

Indeed Razz
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Re: Zeytran, the Teen-Demon

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