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Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  youngjusticeforever on Thu Aug 20, 2015 2:35 pm

Mr.Didathing wrote:You didn't reply to Kyra's second post, or Blueeyedemoness, who both raised some valid points: I.e all of them.  How the depression works, how the powers work, how you "can't work off speculation" and yet that's exactly what you do.

If you can't just take the aspects of him that work and transplant them into an overall better character then the fact is you're going to be stagnant, arguing over this in circles to no avail for ever and ever.

I forgot them. I also explained about the depression. I'm going to address those posts later.
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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  Professor Utonium on Thu Aug 20, 2015 4:57 pm

youngjusticeforever wrote:But, what I really don't understand is, Demongo isn't married to Elyon, even then, unless it turns out Aku is related to them, that'd make Demongo and Elyon cousins, which...just no

Aku is not apart of the Demon Royal Family, despite being one of the most powerful demons. The Abyssal Family is the Demon Royal Family.

Our RP has been going on since mid-2012, so we've already established a lot of things that we can't break, but that doesn't mean we don't want to help you get involved with the RP!

As stated before, it's been established in RP Canon that Aku created Demongo, which would make them related. Demongo is also basically a member of the Demon Royal Family since him and Elyon have been together since the end of 2045 in the RP. I would suggest maybe making Zeytran a childhood friend of Demongo, since there's nothing against being friends with RPCs, (it's encouraged!)

I'm a fan of the Multiple Personalities Disorder, as I have my own Demon OC who has multiple personalities. Their name is Them. You can check out his application if you want ideas on how MPD works and such.

But how does the MPD work? Can they talk to each other out loud? Do they share memories? I'd like some clarification on if the Personalities know each other and how they react to each other.

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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  youngjusticeforever on Thu Aug 20, 2015 5:11 pm

Professor Utonium wrote:
youngjusticeforever wrote:But, what I really don't understand is, Demongo isn't married to Elyon, even then, unless it turns out Aku is related to them, that'd make Demongo and Elyon cousins, which...just no

Aku is not apart of the Demon Royal Family, despite being one of the most powerful demons. The Abyssal Family is the Demon Royal Family.

Our RP has been going on since mid-2012, so we've already established a lot of things that we can't break, but that doesn't mean we don't want to help you get involved with the RP!

As stated before, it's been established in RP Canon that Aku created Demongo, which would make them related. Demongo is also basically a member of the Demon Royal Family since him and Elyon have been together since the end of 2045 in the RP. I would suggest maybe making Zeytran a childhood friend of Demongo, since there's nothing against being friends with RPCs, (it's encouraged!)

I'm a fan of the Multiple Personalities Disorder, as I have my own Demon OC who has multiple personalities. Their name is Them. You can check out his application if you want ideas on how MPD works and such.

But how does the MPD work? Can they talk to each other out loud? Do they share memories? I'd like some clarification on if the Personalities know each other and how they react to each other.

Who is this Demon Family, cause, I have no clue. I can respect that you already have rules and aren't going to be breaking them or changing them

Also, I'd say that he isn't a blood related member, so the only flaw I can see is Aku (CURSE YOU AKU, I CURSE YOU TO THE DEPTHS OF TARTARUS, MAY YOUR WICKED SOUL ROT IN ETERNAL TORMENT) but, I need their to be a significant demon like age gap, so, what if when Demongo was the Demon equivalent to a Teen, he was like, a babysitter, and he and Zeytran grew close, bonding as "brother" likes, so much so, that Zeytran chose to "transform" himself to look more like him.

Also, an interesting thing I read from a story is a thing called a Blood Brother, thing. Basically, it's a ritual where the participants vow by using a magic seal to promise to stay together and help each other, which Demongo broke...so yeah

The Multiple Personality thing, uhm, I didn't give it much thought on the other terms. I would figure that there is like a mindscape, where they interact, and yes, they can share memories, which is why Sorrow doesn't loathe and hate Demongo. Yes, they know of each other (Joy doesn't know about Sorrow though, so there's that, but Sorrow knows about Joy) and Zeytran is often seen talking to the air, which is actually his other personalities.
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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  Professor Utonium on Thu Aug 20, 2015 5:25 pm

As stated before, I think the best bet would be to make Zeytran a childhood friend of Demongo. Or by these standards, just say that the two met in the Underworld and became close friends, so close that he calls Demo his brother.

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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  youngjusticeforever on Thu Aug 20, 2015 5:45 pm

Professor Utonium wrote:As stated before, I think the best bet would be to make Zeytran a childhood friend of Demongo. Or by these standards, just say that the two met in the Underworld and became close friends, so close that he calls Demo his brother.

Perhaps, since I doubt I'm going to be getting anywhere with the Babysitter thing.
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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  Professor Utonium on Thu Aug 20, 2015 5:56 pm

We can't see Demongo babysitting, at least not the pre RP Demongo, but we wouldn't be opposed to Demongo taking in Zeytran as a protege and teaching him his magic. Zeytran's backstory implies he was picked on, which considering Pre RP Demongo was a total whiny, spineless whimp, it wouldn't be hard to see the Soul Collector taking some amount of pity on the creature and teaching it. Plus, it would have given Demongo a loyal minion.

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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  youngjusticeforever on Thu Aug 20, 2015 6:04 pm

Professor Utonium wrote:We can't see Demongo babysitting, at least not the pre RP Demongo, but we wouldn't be opposed to Demongo taking in Zeytran as a protege and teaching him his magic. Zeytran's backstory implies he was picked on, which considering Pre RP Demongo was a total whiny, spineless whimp, it wouldn't be hard to see the Soul Collector taking some amount of pity on the creature and teaching it. Plus, it would have given Demongo a loyal minion.

Oh, I had an idea! Now, since I have freaking NO clue on anything, especially about Demongo post RP, I'm just going out on a guess. This is also assuming that characters like Demongo can actually be interacted with, and it's not just backstory or something. But, what if Zeytran had an entirely different appearance, and Demongo, pitying the creature(and not realizing it was his childhood friend), took him on as a protege (and Zeytran was bullied a lot) eventually realizing it was Zeytran, and shocked, because he didn't realize it because he changed, and due to them drifting apart, he didn't know previously of those changes. This could prove an interesting development, and Zeytran out of sheer gratitude would eventually try to look more in appearance to Demongo, yet remain an individual(thus, the white flames). What would ya think about that? Very Happy
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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  Professor Utonium on Thu Aug 20, 2015 6:21 pm

History needs to be fleshed out. Focus on Zey, not Demongo. Tell us about how he learned of his MPD.

Also, please remove the "widely considered to be brothers" thing from the history, and from the title.

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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  youngjusticeforever on Thu Aug 20, 2015 6:37 pm

Professor Utonium wrote:History needs to be fleshed out. Focus on Zey, not Demongo. Tell us about how he learned of his MPD.

Also, please remove the "widely considered to be brothers" thing from the history, and from the title.

What do you think about my plot, thing, Idea? Also, I added more to the history and told you...wait, no, I didn't. He learned when his other personalities made their voices known, first it was Sorrow, who planted doubts in Zeytran's mind, before taking control for a few hours. Joy then made himself known, and removed those doubts, allowing Zeytran to remain (imagine a battle in the mindscape).
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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  Professor Utonium on Thu Aug 20, 2015 6:46 pm

youngjusticeforever wrote:Alias: The annoying brat brother of Demongo

This needs to be removed.

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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  youngjusticeforever on Thu Aug 20, 2015 6:48 pm

Professor Utonium wrote:
youngjusticeforever wrote:Alias: The annoying brat brother of Demongo

This needs to be removed.

Done, that was the only alias anyways. So, what about the plot idea? Do ye like it? It was one of my rare moments of brilliance...those have been happening rather frequently... *gasp* I'm getting smarter! Razz
Seriously though, do ye like it?
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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  Professor Utonium on Fri Aug 21, 2015 4:29 pm

How did Zeytran and Demongo meet?

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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  youngjusticeforever on Fri Aug 21, 2015 4:36 pm

Professor Utonium wrote:How did Zeytran and Demongo meet?

Well, I'd guess they'd meet in The Underworld, where I guess they were both bullied? I'm not sure...
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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  Professor Utonium on Fri Aug 21, 2015 4:40 pm

Tell us about how they first met and how they became friends besides the bonding.

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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  youngjusticeforever on Fri Aug 21, 2015 4:45 pm

Professor Utonium wrote:Tell us about how they first met and how they became friends besides the bonding.

Well, this is my theory. Demongo saw Zeytran being bullied and taking pity, decided to help him out with his souls, Zeytran thanked Demongo and started to follow Demongo around, asking to hang out. Demongo, tired out by his persistence, agreed to shut him up. Demongo himself was amused and entertained by Zeytran's antics and child-like behavior, and they eventually started hanging out more often. Demongo often pitied Zeytran due to his constant bullying.

This part can easily be removed.

Demongo, due to sticking up for Zeytran, painted a target on his back, so to speak, and ended up being bullied as well...let's just say Zeytran got very angry.

How's that?
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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  Professor Utonium on Fri Aug 21, 2015 4:48 pm

You'll need to edit your history to include that.

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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  youngjusticeforever on Fri Aug 21, 2015 4:52 pm

Professor Utonium wrote:You'll need to edit your history to include that.

Done.
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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  youngjusticeforever on Sun Aug 23, 2015 6:31 am

Can this be approved?
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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  Kaiser on Sun Aug 23, 2015 3:42 pm

In the history, Demo is OOC. You're describing this relationship as actual friends, but this is before he learned about humans, so he would not be this kind for no reason. He'd be manipulating Zeytan to become his minion, and wouldn't be "hurt" by this separation when they became estranged, but rather he would be more determined to get use out of him.

List out specifically what his attacks are and from low-high how strong they are. You can have anywhere between 1-8 of them.

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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  youngjusticeforever on Sun Aug 23, 2015 4:35 pm

Kaiser wrote:In the history, Demo is OOC. You're describing this relationship as actual friends, but this is before he learned about humans, so he would not be this kind for no reason. He'd be manipulating Zeytan to become his minion, and wouldn't be "hurt" by this separation when they became estranged, but rather he would be more determined to get use out of him.

List out specifically what his attacks are and from low-high how strong they are. You can have anywhere between 1-8 of them.

Sorry, I'm sometimes not very good at that, it's hard for me to stay IC sometimes. But, you have to remember, Demongo was trying to manipulate Zeytran who despite his naive nature, isn't an idiot, so Demongo'd probably have to put up a front...maybe, IDK
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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  Kaiser on Sun Aug 23, 2015 5:10 pm

Well, the way I see it, Demongo would try to make him hateful to the world and want to loyally serve him to do evil, if he saw potential in Zeytran. He'd be saying things that would convince him to try to destroy everything; essentially inadvertently trying to make Sorrow the dominant personality and switch to intentionally doing that once he found out about Sorrow.

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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  youngjusticeforever on Sun Aug 23, 2015 5:37 pm

Kaiser wrote:Well, the way I see it, Demongo would try to make him hateful to the world and want to loyally serve him to do evil, if he saw potential in Zeytran. He'd be saying things that would convince him to try to destroy everything; essentially inadvertently trying to make Sorrow the dominant personality and switch to intentionally doing that once he found out about Sorrow.

I can probably make that work, but, I'll need to focus a tad bit more on Demongo, so...yeah. Zeytran, being the niave demon he is would naturally be loyal to Demongo, since Demongo was the first "friend" he ever had, so he'd gladly die for Demongo(deeeep.) But Zeytran, fearful of persecution, attempted to hide his MPD, but, this is a good idea, I'll try to work it in.
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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  youngjusticeforever on Sat Aug 29, 2015 8:16 pm

Is it acceptable now?
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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  Kaiser on Tue Sep 01, 2015 6:42 pm

Charm Voice, Medium, Zeytran can combine Sonics with his natural Alluring nature into a Charm Voice, which can influence decisions sometimes however Zeytran rarely uses this
Sound Vacuum, low, Zeytran can silence a foe or ally temporarily so long as concentration is maintained
Both seem pretty OP to me


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Re: Zeytran, the alluring Demon [Removed]

Post  youngjusticeforever on Tue Sep 01, 2015 10:24 pm

Kaiser wrote:
Charm Voice, Medium, Zeytran can combine Sonics with his natural Alluring nature into a Charm Voice, which can influence decisions sometimes however Zeytran rarely uses this
Sound Vacuum, low, Zeytran can silence a foe or ally temporarily so long as concentration is maintained
Both seem pretty OP to me


Sound Vacuum merely makes them unable to speak, but it strains Zeytran, so total concentration is required, or else it's less potent.

Charm Voice, there's a reason I said he rarely uses this: In other terms, I'm going to ask the other user if I can use it. Or I'll use it on my own characters. But Charm Voice taxes him even further, needing to combine both Sonic and his natural allure, it alone taxes him to concentrate his allure, but to combine it with Sonics? Yeah, that's very taxing. Besides, Charm Voice can only influence, if it goes directly against morals(and the like) it won't work, and it can't force, it can only influence.
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