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Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus

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Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus

Post  youngjusticeforever on Wed Sep 09, 2015 5:29 am

Name: Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus
Age: 14
Ethnicity: Caucasian
Race (If your OC is an alien): Human
Allegiance: None
Origins: Magic User
Powers: School of Elementalist/Shaman
Attacks:

Seal of Techna, a medium level Techno spell, Cynthia uses it to seal important information, or she can trap her opponent with it for 2 minutes tops.

Fire Spheres "Astrea" can either create smaller weaker Fireballs the size of a tennis ball that are released in 3s, two football sized balls of fire that are slightly more powerful or one basketball sized fireball(this size has a cooldown period of two minutes) that is much more powerful when it gains momentum and particles in the air make it stronger.

Fear Key A medium level spell, whoever is hit by it sees their worst fear come true, it only works once because they need to overcome it, and the user COULD be affected if redirected by something such as a mirror.

Dust Gust This spell helps heals cuts, bruises and the sort, nothing serious since this is a low level spell, it manifests in a green tinted dust, it will not heal wounds instantly.

Appearance: Cynthia has waist length pitch black hair with streaks of Purple at the end and silver glitter all over, mostly in the streaks. She usually wears a body suit that's black, covered up by a fur coat and a T-shirt, as well as Boots. She also has several Kunai, some hidden in her boots, pockets or in a belt around her waist.

Strengths: "Astrea" is extremely flexible and acrobatics, Cynthia is very adept with technology and science, mostly dealing with designs and on occasion Cynthia may play with Chemicals(much to other's chargin). "Astrea" is well rounded in weapons, but she prefers Kunai as they are, in her own words, "graceful yet deadly"

Weaknesses: Hand-To-Hand combat, low physical strength and she tends to get dizzy a lot.

Personality: "Astrea" was born an assassin. She enjoys hunting her enemies, sometimes even letting her foes escape to prolong the hunt, and she has a twisted sense of humor. She isn't back-handed though, she's the type of person who will stab you in the stomach while looking at you right in the face and smiling. She does not seem to like men much, and is somewhat coco in her beliefs.

History: Born to John "Sentinel" Shadeus and Miranda "Khione" Kethra, a pair of assassins(who were married?), Cynthia Shadeus was the youngest child, next to Kayla "Phoenix" Shadeus. Her father ended up in prison for the first three years of her life. Her sister used to tell her how he was horrible. Her mother managed to be proven innocent. Dubbed "Astrea" by her mother(and her father) at age five, she was trained for recon and stealthy assassinations. At the age of fourteen, she did her first assassination; she killed a man who, according to her managers(her parents and sister) stole from a 'family friend'.

At the start of the war, she fought with her sister Kayla in the war, in which they were partnered with a guy named Blake. While Cynthia was fighting Fusion Spawns her sister disappeared, she blamed Blake for this, and became very spiteful. Ever since then, she's prepared to fight back against the Fusions, and fight back hard

Do you use nanos: Nope

Is this good?


Last edited by youngjusticeforever on Thu Oct 29, 2015 4:08 pm; edited 5 times in total (Reason for editing : Since Zeytran's about to be finished I'm redo-ing Cynthia.)
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Re: Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus

Post  zerowing21 on Wed Sep 09, 2015 11:10 am

Hold the boat. If the character is human like pure human, they can not have powers.


Fear gas? Rename it please. I don't want people to think Scarecrow with this.


How can she bad with a normal knife? They can be used as make shift throwing knives.


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Re: Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus

Post  Kaiser on Wed Sep 09, 2015 5:47 pm

First thing, can each attack have its own paragraph? Makes things easier to read if they're each their own block.

....
I'm noticing you switch between her real name and Astrea a lot. What's the importance of it? Where did it come from?

Origins: Human
Powers: School of Elementalist/Shaman
Origins would be Magic user if they have magic.

"Astrea" tends to be scatterbrained and ditzy, Cynthia seems to have a knack in messing things up
These might as well be the same thing. If you're a ditz, chances are you're called that because you don't realize you messed up.

Cynthia learned her first spell, Dust Gust, in which a wind gusts a green tinted dust.
How did she find out about the spell? What was it like when she first learned it?

How did she get involved with the war? Where did her obsession over Fusions come from? How old was she when she got involved with the war?

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Re: Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus

Post  youngjusticeforever on Wed Sep 09, 2015 11:54 pm

zerowing21 wrote:Hold the boat. If the character is human like pure human, they can not have powers.


Fear gas? Rename it please. I don't want people to think Scarecrow with this.  


How can she bad with a normal knife? They can be used as make shift throwing knives.



I'm not really sure what the difference really is, tbh. Cynthia is Human, yes. But can use Magic.

Fine.

I'm changing it.

Kaiser wrote:First thing, can each attack have its own paragraph? Makes things easier to read if they're each their own block.

....
I'm noticing you switch between her real name and Astrea a lot. What's the importance of it? Where did it come from?

Origins: Human
Powers: School of Elementalist/Shaman
Origins would be Magic user if they have magic.

"Astrea" tends to be scatterbrained and ditzy, Cynthia seems to have a knack in messing things up
These might as well be the same thing. If you're a ditz, chances are you're called that because you don't realize you messed up.

Cynthia learned her first spell, Dust Gust, in which a wind gusts a green tinted dust.
How did she find out about the spell? What was it like when she first learned it?

How did she get involved with the war? Where did her obsession over Fusions come from? How old was she when she got involved with the war?

Astrea is an alias she adopted and only those who know her(which if you want, I suppose I might approve) before the war, would know the name Cynthia for her. She uses it to distance herself from her former self, in a way to try to erase her memories.

I really don't think I need to change that part of her personality.

She didn't learn it, she was just focusing really hard and it just came to her. I'd need more understanding of what you want before I can reply

She got involved with Kayla, her obsession was explained, she is obsessing over both forgetting Kayla(who she can't, so she seeks to erase any memories of her, such as fusions) and yet also finding her, causing her obsession to become twice as powerful.

I'm gonna say she joined the war when she was around 12.
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Re: Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus

Post  Kyra_Xyrespace on Thu Sep 10, 2015 2:55 am

youngjusticeforever wrote:Appearance: Cynthia has waist length pitch black hair with streaks of Purple at the end and silver glitter all over, mostly in the streaks.

What does she typically wear?

Personality: Scatterbrained, Ditzy, Bubbly and somewhat Chaotic. "Astrea" seems to not understand why people are mad at her, and she has been diagnosed with Autism. She doesn't like being touched much unless it's someone she trusts or feels she can trust. She also has a strange obsession with Tracking, Death and hunting Fusions. The latter is abnormal by most, her obsession with ending them creeping many out.

In her history you say she was abused, yet nothing in the personality suggests this. You need to expand because the personality is basic.

Do you use nanos: Yes, but not often

Magic Users do not use/are not capable of using Nanos as explained here.

I'm not really sure what the difference really is, tbh. Cynthia is Human, yes. But can use Magic.

Please read here for the different Origins. Humans are basic and are not allowed to have any powers. Now a human can be a magician, but then their origin is not human; it's magic user.

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Re: Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus

Post  youngjusticeforever on Fri Sep 11, 2015 12:59 am

Kyra_Xyrespace wrote:
youngjusticeforever wrote:Appearance: Cynthia has waist length pitch black hair with streaks of Purple at the end and silver glitter all over, mostly in the streaks.

What does she typically wear?

Personality: Scatterbrained, Ditzy, Bubbly and somewhat Chaotic. "Astrea" seems to not understand why people are mad at her, and she has been diagnosed with Autism. She doesn't like being touched much unless it's someone she trusts or feels she can trust. She also has a strange obsession with Tracking, Death and hunting Fusions. The latter is abnormal by most, her obsession with ending them creeping many out.

In her history you say she was abused, yet nothing in the personality suggests this. You need to expand because the personality is basic.

Do you use nanos: Yes, but not often

Magic Users do not use/are not capable of using Nanos as explained here.

I'm not really sure what the difference really is, tbh. Cynthia is Human, yes. But can use Magic.

Please read here for the different Origins. Humans are basic and are not allowed to have any powers. Now a human can be a magician, but then their origin is not human; it's magic user.

I'll fix it. Also, check the bolded for what suggest she might've been abused.
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Re: Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus

Post  zerowing21 on Mon Sep 21, 2015 7:22 pm

You didn't update the personality at all young like kyra wanted. Not wanting to be touched isn't exactly what I'd call a strong suggestion or indicator for abuse. There are many along the autism spectrum that don't want to be touch. We have few ocs on here who were abused and they all show some signs of it in some ways or another. Depending on the abuse type, mental, physical or a combination of the two, several things can happen.
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Re: Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus

Post  youngjusticeforever on Tue Sep 22, 2015 6:57 pm

zerowing21 wrote:You didn't update the personality at all young like kyra wanted. Not wanting to be touched isn't exactly what I'd call a strong suggestion or indicator for abuse. There are many along the autism spectrum that don't want to be touch. We have few ocs on here who were abused and they all show some signs of it in some ways or another. Depending on the abuse type, mental, physical or a combination of the two, several things can happen.

Does it really matter if she shows signs or not? I can understand why you'd feel that way and stuff, I do. But is it necessary? Besides, even if it's required, does it need to be a strong indicator or suggestion?
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Re: Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus

Post  zerowing21 on Tue Sep 22, 2015 7:06 pm

If you want to really make it authentic and believable there has to be something in that personality that suggests it. It could be hidden well or near the surface but it wouldn't indicate abuse unless someone was looking for the warning signs. We have 3 different ocrpcs that have been abused, all of whom have something in their personality that reflects the level of their abuse, be it from a lack of trust, to being attacked to someone that saved them, to having issues with begin abandoned by their new family.
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Re: Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus

Post  youngjusticeforever on Tue Sep 22, 2015 7:36 pm

zerowing21 wrote:If you want to really make it authentic and believable there has to be something in that personality that suggests it. It could be hidden well or near the surface but it wouldn't indicate abuse unless someone was looking for the warning signs. We have 3 different ocrpcs that have been abused, all of whom have something in their personality that reflects the level of their abuse, be it from a lack of trust, to being attacked to someone that saved them, to having issues with begin abandoned by their new family.

She hates being touched. Literally. She will physically and violently lash out if you touch her. She's also paranoid, hence the Magic Spell "Seal of Techna." She also tries to disconnect from the real world via technology.
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Re: Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus

Post  zerowing21 on Tue Sep 22, 2015 7:52 pm

If the not liking to be touched is cuz of the abuse. Its PTSD related and you need to expand it more, along with explaining how it links to her paranoia and her disconnect. BY doing that you make more sense with it and add to the personality. This kind of stuff must be explained.

If its autism related, then its due to the magnification of the feeling of it.
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Re: Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus

Post  youngjusticeforever on Wed Sep 23, 2015 3:32 am

zerowing21 wrote:If the not liking to be touched is cuz of the abuse. Its PTSD related and you need to expand it more, along with explaining how it links to her paranoia and her disconnect. BY doing that you make more sense with it and add to the personality. This kind of stuff must be explained.

If its autism related, then its due to the magnification of the feeling of it.

She's distrusting of people, that's her paranoia. She escapes through technology, that's her relieve method: Escaping real life and going into the virtual world, she feels safe there and can't be harmed. Can you give me an example on how I need to expand further?
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Re: Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus

Post  zerowing21 on Wed Sep 23, 2015 9:06 am

You need to explain that all this is linked to her abuse in someway. If you don't then it won't make much sense. Do some research to help you explain it.
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Re: Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus

Post  youngjusticeforever on Thu Oct 29, 2015 4:05 pm

Can Cynthia be used now?
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Re: Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus

Post  Professor Utonium on Thu Oct 29, 2015 5:01 pm

youngjusticeforever wrote:Can Cynthia be used now?

She hasn't received any approvals, so no.

In her history, it says she first killed a man at 14 and then going into "when the war started." The Fusion War has been going on for five years in the RP, and Cynthia is currently 14. Did she recently kill someone, or is your history just inconsistent with the RP Canon?

I'd also like to see the history fleshed out a bit more. It's a little generic and bland.

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Re: Cynthia "Astrea" Shadeus

Post  youngjusticeforever on Thu Oct 29, 2015 5:45 pm

Professor Utonium wrote:
youngjusticeforever wrote:Can Cynthia be used now?

She hasn't received any approvals, so no.

In her history, it says she first killed a man at 14 and then going into "when the war started." The Fusion War has been going on for five years in the RP, and Cynthia is currently 14. Did she recently kill someone, or is your history just inconsistent with the RP Canon?

I'd also like to see the history fleshed out a bit more. It's a little generic and bland.

I'm not sure. I think she might have just recently killed someone.

I'm not sure how to. Like with Zeytran, her backstory is somewhat...difficult, I don't want to make it seem repetitive. She was an assassin.
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